Some explanation about me in the last few months

[Sensuikan San]

Good post, Maciamo. Switching countries is always hard - even when you come from a (very) similiar culture and speak the same language! It takes guts to finally admit that the strain is a little too much. You did the right thing.

.... but .....

.... now you've made me feel not so sure about wanting to visit Japan ... !

ジョン

[Brooker]

Japan is notorious for being unaccepting of foreigners and for believing that they couldn't possibly understand their ways. It seems like you've made the right choice and that Japanese life had warn on you. I stayed in Japan for 15 months, which was just about right for me I think. It was long enough that I had tired of Japan, but not long enough that I had grown to hate it.

[Elizabeth]

.... but .....

.... now you've made me feel not so sure about wanting to visit Japan ... !

ジョン

Most long-term foreign residents (that haven't married into it or gotten their permanent residency like Maciamo) that I know have realistic, balanced
perspectives on their experience and end up enjoying much more about it than you'd ever suspect from reading forum stories which naturally attract a larger percentage of the dissatisfied.

Not as many expats come online to rehash at great length the beauty and joy of being in Japan as to grouse and complain. As usual, it's the loudest negativity that attracts the most attention, unfortunately. Hopefully that will change here somewhat -- as a tourist you won't be there long enough for the
unsavory side to show itself and have absolutely nothing to worry about.

[Maciamo]

Most long-term foreign residents (that haven't married into it or gotten their permanent residency like Maciamo) that I know have realistic, balanced
perspectives on their experience and end up enjoying much more about it than you'd ever suspect from reading forum stories which naturally attract a larger percentage of the dissatisfied.

Note that I compared my experience in Japan with my other experiences of living in foreign countries. Japan was the 7th country where I have lived for at least a few months. As Brooker said, staying 1 or 2 years would not have led to the same result. I only started to get fed up in my 4th year. But unlike "tourists", I couldn't just leave Japan so easily once I started to get fed up, first because of my wife, secondly because of all the furniture, etc. I had bought, thirdly because of all the time I had invested learning Japanese and about Japanese culture, politics, etc., and finally I had already applied for permanent residency.

I also didn't come to Japan because I was in love for the country in the first place. It is true that I had been interested in Japan for a long time, but not fanatically like some manga, video games or J-pop lovers, and I was also very much interested in many other countries, with which the comparison was unavoidable.

Not as many expats come online to rehash at great length the beauty and joy of being in Japan as to grouse and complain. As usual, it's the loudest negativity that attracts the most attention, unfortunately.

And contrarily to many expats, I tried my best to appreciate the country in all its aspects, which is partly why I took so many pictures of Japan for the gallery or I made the Practical, Culture, Society, Language and Entertainment of this website. I did try to see all the better sides of Japan. But that wasn't enough to counterbalance the negative aspects for a foreign long-term resident wanting to be accepted as part of the society there.

[pipokun]

why I took so many pictures of Japan for the gallery or I made the Practical, Culture, Society, Language and Entertainment of this website. I did try to see all the better sides of Japan.

True, I actually respect your great contribution, data, knowledge, and photos, here. It is far greater than my non-Japanese friends.
But one thing I noticed here was I could not imagine your real life in Tokyo.

Did you try to find the solution in your community? I don't know which ku you lived in.

[Mars Man]

All said above, I will just say that I was glad to see that well put statement, and heartfelt apology. I greatly appreciate the candor behind it. I'm sorry that things here didn't work out so well, but more than that I do wish you the best there back in Belgium. One of my good friends here, who plays some mean keyboard, is from Belgium too. We often get together with one guy from the UK, and a few other Japanese players, and put down some good ole low down dirty blues, and jazz--along with some good ole rock too. Perhaps that helps a lot.

Anyway, I hope to hear from you on the Europe Forum from time to time--it will encourage me to go there more often--and that things will still run smooth on the Japan Forum.

I WISH YOU AND YOUR WIFE THE BEST !!!!!!!!!!!!!