I have answered your question hereOriginally Posted by garethparke
Did I mention my age anywhere on this forum ? As for the Japanese I meet, I probably have met and discussed wth a wider range of people than most foreigners in Japan (esp. tourists). On one side I have my wife's Japanese family, all her friends (I'd say nearly 100 that I met - she is very sociable ), then people I meet through my job, and finally people I observed, eavedrop to in the train or in cafes/restaurants, people I come into brief contact in the street, in shops, government offices, etc., and why not also add people on TV. I like analysing how all these people think and behave, and take particular attention in remembering what they say about foreigners, Westerners, foreign countries or languages.Originally Posted by garethparke
Overall, I'd say I mostly meet people in the 20's, 30's and 40's, but many of the most negative experiences I had where with people over 50 (although not my mother-in-law, who is very kind). I have listened (or heard through my wife) enough to my grand-mother-in-law though to get a good idea of what older people think of foreigners. Even after 2 years in the family, the grand-mother still wouldn't talk to me directly and only address me via my wife, her mother or somebody else. She was persuaded I couldn't understand Japanese, although I answered in Japanese in front of her, and talked to my mother-in-law only in Japanese as she doesn't speak English (or other languages) at all. I can tell you that the same happens with many elderly Japanese people (mostly over 70), such as the neighbours who just ignore me even when I greet them. I also had many salespeople ringing at my door, and almost everytime they would be all embarassed when they saw that a gaijin opened the door. Some would even say aloud "aah, komatta, gaijin da!" (oh ****, it's a foreigner!) thinking I can't understand them. These are mostly the people I complain about. Not the people who come to talk to foreigners by themselves or want to practice their English (they are still a minority, although it wouldn't appear in places like Ginza, Shibuya or Shinjuku).
As we say (in French) the truth comes from the mouth of the children, and it certainly does about their parents or teachers. I try as much as I can to listen to the reaction of children when they see me, a gaijin, or how suspiciously they look at me. I can easily say if there parents are gaijin-friendly or not just by observing them with their parents. That requires good observation and psychological skills, but I love it.
As for the stupid questions, misconceptions about foreignc ountries and prejudices about foreigners, I have surprisingly found them in every age and socio-econonomic groups. I know that some Japanese do not even realise how offensive it can be to doubt a foreigner's ability to use chopsticks, because some of my wife's friends who have studied abroad and had foreign boyfriends still asked me such questions. When I told my wife how these questions irritated me, as there is no reason I couldn't use chopsticks while living in Japan, and that they ask me only because I am a foreigner, even when they know exactly how long I have been in Japan. My wife had no idea, but has since taken my side and now explains to her friend that it is not polite to ask such things, as I am a human like everybody else and not some kind of retarded creature called "gaijin".
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