Quote Originally Posted by Brooker
I can see why her being affected by these Japanese morals has given you some concern. Japanese often see Western views on love and fidelity as being naive and unrealistic.
Exactly. That's the point.

The only thing you can do is assess the situation and her as best you can. Does she seem like a person who would lie a lot? Do you seem like someone who would be easily lied to and gullable? I'm guessing the answers are NO.
The problem is that Japanese people also have a very different approach regarding lies. The Japanese are famous for their politeness and hypocrisy, and about any Japanese would think that lying is ok or even necessary if it is to avoid causing trouble (harm, offence, anger, sadness, whatever). I have experienced it many times, also with my wife. She (or other Japanese) also expect me to lie when necessary. That does not fit my personality or values at all, as for me frankness will always be better than a lie, even if it causes much pain. So if my wife asks me what I think of the new clothes or bag she bought or the food she cooked, I used to always tell her exactly how I felt about it, be it positive or negative. That made her angry a few times and she eventually told me "but can't you just say you like it and made a very good choice, even if it's not true !" How am I suppose to understand that ? I best I just don't say anything, or say "I am not sure" or change topic, but lying (or cheating, for that matter) just feels like a crime to me. It's certainly as bad as stealing. From this point of view, that makes almost all Japanese petty criminals. The question is, can I live with it, being married to one of their number ?