Some explanation about me in the last few months

[DoctorP]

I also wish you the best Maciamo. But from what I have read of many of your previous posts, I don't think that you can ever be truly happy. The only way that I could see you happy is if you were to become involved in the political scene where you choose to live. You have a very strong will, but you lack the thick skin to live in another country (permanently). You have such a wealth of knowledge and a desire to learn, but you truly become irritated much too easily. I think that with you being back in Belgium is the best thing for you.

[Maciamo]

I also wish you the best Maciamo. But from what I have read of many of your previous posts, I don't think that you can ever be truly happy. The only way that I could see you happy is if you were to become involved in the political scene where you choose to live. You have a very strong will, but you lack the thick skin to live in another country (permanently). You have such a wealth of knowledge and a desire to learn, but you truly become irritated much too easily. I think that with you being back in Belgium is the best thing for you.

I appreciate your concern, but as I mentioned above, I have lived in 5 other countries than Japan and Belgium and the only one where I didn't feel much like staying too long (because of similar ignorance to Japan, although not half as bad) was Australia.

I already noticed that many things are much better in Belgium, or at least in the "good parts" of Belgium. As much as I was amazed by the homogenity of Japan (way of thinking, architecture...), I had nearly forgotten that Western countries had huge differences depending on the region, city, and even districts of a same city. In other words, there are super-rich, very safe and beautiful districts on the one hand (imagine Beverly Hills in LA), and poor and not so safe districts (take some suburbs of LA) - something that does not really happen in Japan. The same is true of the people. Some are very well mannered and very well educated, while others are vandals or thugs.

What "suprised" me when I came back here is how friendly people were. There wasn't this impersonality, fake manners and ready-made phrases for customers that are the norm in Japan. For example, when moving to Belgium from abroad, after registering at the town hall, the local police officer has to come to your house to check that you really live there. So he came, and we he kindly explained about the structure of the police in the region, what number to call in case of emergency or non-emergency, told me about himself, his family, experiences, etc. He didn't ask me more questions than necessary for his questionnaire (just double-checked my name and telephone number and asked if I had a car to register). In Japan, not only don't they do that with foreigners or returnee Japanese, but had isuch a system existed the police officer would probably have stood on the doorstep asking his questions in 2min, in the most impersonal manner possible, and treating me as a potential suspect rather than a citizen to whom he offers his protection.

I have also noticed that prices in Belgium are much lower than in Japan, except for electronics (slightly cheaper in Japan) and restaurants, that are at least twice more expensive (but supermarkets are 2 to 5x cheaper for the same product). But salaries are about the same as in Japan. Likewise, houses are 100x better in Belgium than in Japan. Even what is described here as "social lodging" is much better than the best one could find in Tokyo (I am talking just about the building's beauty and quality, not the furniture or decoration, which depends on the occupant's taste).

Then people are more relaxed, but also more knowledgable, more matured and more productive (work less to get the same result). People don't push in the train, don't walk into you in the street because they don't look where they are going... There are less vending machines in the street, but more inside buildings (esp. companies), and they also dispense snacks, sandwiches, cooked meals, etc., something I haven't seen in Japan.

One point where Japan easily beats Belgium is the dedicated to customers. Here the customer is not king. If you ask a plumber to repair or install something, you may wait for 2 months before he comes. This may be due to a lack of plumbers (or other people in the construction industry, for that matter), though. Then, one big complain about Belgium's main ISP is that they make us pay more than in Japan, for a slightly slower connection, AND they limit the monthly bandwidth ! (so after 2 weeks I had already reached my quota and had to pay a supplement to unlock it !).

Food-wise I can't complain. Belgian food is as good as Japanese food, and there are restaurants from almost any country. There is just a lack of Japanese and Korean food (apart from sushi, tempura, teppanyaki and yakiniku), but there are a few Japanese supermarkets. We can also find many kinds of meat not easily available (if at all) in Japan, such as turkey, duck, rabbit, venison...

[Tsuyoiko]

Food-wise I can't complain. Belgian food is as good as Japanese food, and there are restaurants from almost any country. There is just a lack of Japanese and Korean food (apart from sushi, tempura, teppanyaki and yakiniku), but there are a few Japanese supermarkets. We can also find many kinds of meat not easily available (if at all) in Japan, such as turkey, duck, rabbit, venison...

I can't speak for Japan, but the thing I like best about Belgium is the food. Being vegetarian can be difficult, but it is easy in Belgium as there is so much variety - for example, you can always get something vegetarian in an Indian or Italian restaurant.

[Maciamo]

I fogot to say that, most importantly, when I am in Europe (whatever the country), people don't look at me strangely in the street, don't feign not to understand what I say so that they don't have to serve me, don't question my ability to do various daily things (use chopsticks, eat this or that...), are not surprised when I speak their language (even if they see it isn't my mother tongue), children don't point their finger at me saying "gaijin, gaijin !" or "Hello America !", I don't get refused entry or accommodation anywhere, neighbours don't check whether I sorted my garbage properly because I am a foreigner, people don't answer to my wife when I ask them a question (or vice versa), etc., etc. In Japan, there wasn't single a day in which many of these things didn't happen (except if I locked myself at home, and even then I could get salespeople ringing at my door and exclaim "ah, gaijin da !" and leave without explanation). Overall, it is much more relaxing NOT to be in Japan.

[pipokun]

tell me how you and your wife dealt with your shakai hoken here?
did she quit her pension scheme here?
and how much you can expect to refund it?

i bet this info would be much more practical.

[Elizabeth]

I fogot to say that, most importantly, when I am in Europe (whatever the country), people don't look at me strangely in the street, don't feign not to understand what I say so that they don't have to serve me, don't question my ability to do various daily things (use chopsticks, eat this or that...), are not surprised when I speak their language (even if they see it isn't my mother tongue), children don't point their finger at me saying "gaijin, gaijin !" or "Hello America !", I don't get refused entry or accommodation anywhere, neighbours don't check whether I sorted my garbage properly because I am a foreigner, people don't answer to my wife when I ask them a question (or vice versa), etc., etc. In Japan, there wasn't single a day in which many of these things didn't happen (except if I locked myself at home, and even then I could get salespeople ringing at my door and exclaim "ah, gaijin da !" and leave without explanation). Overall, it is much more relaxing NOT to be in Japan.

本当 ? あなたの考えが読めるでしょう。 Anyway, you may have forgotten this time, but these stories of being a stranger in a strange land have been played and replayed time and time to no end for anyone still reading this thread....

[jt_]

I fogot to say that, most importantly, when I am in Europe (whatever the country), people don't look at me strangely in the street, don't feign not to understand what I say so that they don't have to serve me, don't question my ability to do various daily things (use chopsticks, eat this or that...), are not surprised when I speak their language (even if they see it isn't my mother tongue), children don't point their finger at me saying "gaijin, gaijin !" or "Hello America !", I don't get refused entry or accommodation anywhere, neighbours don't check whether I sorted my garbage properly because I am a foreigner, people don't answer to my wife when I ask them a question (or vice versa), etc., etc. In Japan, there wasn't single a day in which many of these things didn't happen (except if I locked myself at home, and even then I could get salespeople ringing at my door and exclaim "ah, gaijin da !" and leave without explanation). Overall, it is much more relaxing NOT to be in Japan.

Maciamo,

I can completely relate to the frustration you felt with all of these things you describe. It can be very aggravating for a person who is making a sincere effort to learn the language and culture -- to "go native", so to speak -- to be constantly confronted with people who simply cannot get beyond your physical appearance (or the fact that you may not be a 100%-flawless native speaker of the language) and deal with you as a human being.

I just find it very unfortunate that you seem to have come out of Japan with only negative experiences. Personally, for me, I have had experienced some of the things you describe... if only occasionally. I can't say I've experienced all of them. I also work every day in an office setting with many people who I communicate with entirely in Japanese, and who never draw negative attention to my "foreignness" or make insulting stereotypes about me. They are eager to listen to my opinions/thoughts, and I'm interested in hearing theirs. Some people are more enlightened than others, but I have no doubts that they're all good and decent people. Anyway, that's just at the office. Then, outside of work I have other Japanese friends, and my relationships with them have even less to do with the fact that I'm a "foreigner"... we just enjoy each other's company, share our interests and thoughts on the world and life, and whatnot.

I am still saddened on some level that I will never be fully accepted as "native" in Japan. (As opposed to say, a Japanese person immigrating to my home country or yours, who would no doubt be accepted as such after living there for a long enough time and picking up the language and local customs.) Still, this has come to frustrate me less and less through the years -- probably because my increased language proficiency and knowledge of the culture has allowed me to build more meaningful relationships with enough good people that it doesn't matter as much when I run into the occasional ignorant type. (Maybe it also comes from a gradual understanding and acceptance of the fact that ignorance doesn't necessarily stand for ill will.)

I just think that it's unfortunate that you never reached this point, despite the time you invested into living in Japan and learning the language (at a fairly high, if not perfect, level). I can only conclude that maybe you met the wrong people, and spent too much time around them rather than seeking out more open-minded types who would accept you as who you are without being preoccupied with your "foreignness."

I imagine that you'll be much happier in your new home, but it seems like you're still holding many negative feelings about Japan which won't be easily subdued. I hope that you can let some of these go with time, and still continue your involvement with Japan, getting a more positive experience out of it than you have up until now.

[Maciamo]

I just find it very unfortunate that you seem to have come out of Japan with only negative experiences.

It is not the case. There have been many good experiences, but more at the beginning. With time, the negative side accumulates with little new good experiences, and the balance shifts to the negative side. The balance has probably shifted early 2005 for me. There have been a few exceptional people I have met in Japan, whom I won't forget, that do not enter in the category of people who bother me.

I am still saddened on some level that I will never be fully accepted as "native" in Japan. (As opposed to say, a Japanese person immigrating to my home country or yours, who would no doubt be accepted as such after living there for a long enough time and picking up the language and local customs.)

I don't even ask to be considered as a native, just as a long-term resident with a good knowledge of the culture and customs. Unfortunately, most people won't even grant me that. I am just like any freshly arrived tourist to them. I was so shocked when after teaching a group of people for 2 years, they were still surprised that I could read such simple kanji as 使用中 ("in use"), although I had told them many times that I mostly speak Japanese at home with my wife.

I imagine that you'll be much happier in your new home, but it seems like you're still holding many negative feelings about Japan which won't be easily subdued.

How can you forget things that have bothered you for several years of your (relatively short) existence ?

[jt_]

It is not the case. There have been many good experiences, but more at the beginning. With time, the negative side accumulates with little new good experiences, and the balance shifts to the negative side. The balance has probably shifted early 2005 for me. There have been a few exceptional people I have met in Japan, whom I won't forget, that do not enter in the category of people who bother me.

I find this interesting (and unfortunate), because in my case, the balance has shifted more in favor of good experiences the longer I've been involved with Japan, and as my understanding of the culture and command of the language have improved. This is why I'm surprised that your good experiences have been so few (and actually decreased with time), as I know that you have a fairly good command of the language, and I would think that would have allowed you to make more positive relationships, i.e. people who you can have meaningful conversations with, as opposed to "Wow, you can use chopsticks!" etc.

I don't even ask to be considered as a native, just as a long-term resident with a good knowledge of the culture and customs. Unfortunately, most people won't even grant me that. I am just like any freshly arrived tourist to them. I was so shocked when after teaching a group of people for 2 years, they were still surprised that I could read such simple kanji as 使用中 ("in use"), although I had told them many times that I mostly speak Japanese at home with my wife.

Well, it may be a stereotype, but I find it hard to blame them sometimes, as there are certainly a fair number of foreigners in Japan (especially those who work as language instructors) who have been in the country for an extended period of time and still are not particularly competent in Japanese. You may have told them that you speak Japanese with your wife, but perhaps it just didn't really sink in with them, as they weren't seeing you speak Japanese on a regular basis. (I imagine that you probably didn't use Japanese in your classes.)

Did you ever consider trying to find another line of work -- one in which you would actually be working in a Japanese language environment? I guarantee that if you were working as a translator/interpreter or the like (I imagine you could be very successful in this field, considering you are not simply bilingual but multi-lingual) the people handing you translation assignments would not be shocked at your ability to read kanji -- since that would be part and parcel of the work that you receive a salary for.

How can you forget things that have bothered you for several years of your (relatively short) existence?

I'm not a good person to ask, as I have a hard time letting go of negative experiences myself. I just try to improve my situation (when I feel that the causes of my frustration are external) and reevaluate my attitude (when I feel that the causes are internal) -- usually it's a combination of both.

You've improved your situation by moving back to Belgium. I can't question this decision, as I can never know your feelings and your situation as well as you do -- you sound happier, and if you are, then I think that's wonderful for you.　　

I just have this feeling that some of the negative experiences you had to suffer through were not just a product of "Japan", but rather your particular environment within Japan, and that you could have had a much more positive experience if you had explored some other opportunities. Perhaps you never would have been truly happy there -- as there are probably some fundamental aspects of Japanese society that you may have irreconcilable differences with -- but you may have been able to have a more rewarding and less frustrating experience there.

[Maciamo]

This is why I'm surprised that your good experiences have been so few (and actually decreased with time), as I know that you have a fairly good command of the language, and I would think that would have allowed you to make more positive relationships, i.e. people who you can have meaningful conversations with, as opposed to "Wow, you can use chopsticks!" etc.

Exactly ! I wished to have more meaningful conversations, but I have noticed that it is hard to find people who are willing to go beyond the stereotypical questions. Actually, even with students who spoke well English and with whom I did have meaningful discussions about politics, business, history, cultural differences, travel or whatever, most of them still asked me those annoying stereotypical questions from every few months (but as I met lots of different people everyday, I got asked those questions in average once or twice a day).

Well, it may be a stereotype, but I find it hard to blame them sometimes, as there are certainly a fair number of foreigners in Japan (especially those who work as language instructors) who have been in the country for an extended period of time and still are not particularly competent in Japanese. You may have told them that you speak Japanese with your wife, but perhaps it just didn't really sink in with them, as they weren't seeing you speak Japanese on a regular basis. (I imagine that you probably didn't use Japanese in your classes.)

Indeed, I did not use Japanese during the class, but whenever someone thought aloud in Japanese about a word they didn't know, I proposed the English translation. So, they knew I could understand even some words they didn't know in English (and they were quite advanced students).

Did you ever consider trying to find another line of work -- one in which you would actually be working in a Japanese language environment?

I wouldn't like to work for a Japanese company for several reasons (hypocritical politeness, routine, litlle delegation of power or responsibilities to "junior employees", long hours compared to the pay, compulsory after-work drinking, etc.). I am too independent-minded to be an employee in any country, I think. I prefer freelance or self-employed.

I guarantee that if you were working as a translator/interpreter or the like (I imagine you could be very successful in this field, considering you are not simply bilingual but multi-lingual) the people handing you translation assignments would not be shocked at your ability to read kanji -- since that would be part and parcel of the work that you receive a salary for.

I did work as a freelance translator. But who knows that apart from the few people who order the translations ?

The irony is that even people with whom I only speak Japanese (e.g. my wife's friends), who know I only speak Japanese with my wife, still get surprised that I can read simple kanji, and all ask stereotypical question. There seem to be no limit to the number of weird questions in the line of "do you have this in your country like in Japan ?" or "can you do that like the Japanese ?". It is justly the longer you stay and the longer you know people that you realise that they will never stop, no matter how well they know you. First they ask questions that everybody ask about typically Japanese things (chopsticks, sushi, futon, natto...). But then, when they have asked these things a few months or years ago, they still feel the need to ask about more ordinary things like a garlic-crusher or a vegetable-grater. Of course, the conversation is NOT limited to that. We speak about many things, but why on earth are they so obsessed about knowing whether we also have vegetable-graters in Europe, and why wouldn't there be ? What annoys me in all this is the way they ask, which usually feels like "you can't possibly have this in your country, can you ?". Maybe that's a problem with the language itself (most probably with the culture and way of thinking though).

Perhaps you never would have been truly happy there -- as there are probably some fundamental aspects of Japanese society that you may have irreconcilable differences with

Yes, that's probably it. That's because of the obsessive attitude of the Japanese to separate between uchi (Japan) and soto ("foreign countries"), so that no foreigner will ever be treated like a normal person, and that he/she will always be the object of the most naive questioning, that I can't accept. That's not a problem at all for short-term visitors (esp. first timers), but it prevents anyone with a substantial knowledge of Japanese culture and society to be satisfied as a long-term resident. The less you know about Japan, and the more you still have to learn from people, and the more you can enjoy Japan. I believe I have come to a point where I am highly fed-up of being ask 100x the same stereotypical questions over and over again. For me it feels like a formed of "societal nagging" (if you have ever experienced nagging from a woman, you might understand what I mean... ).

[Gaijinian]

Ah, Maciamo, glad to see you happy. You definitely had a negative going...
Belgium sounds nice

Anyway, do you still speak Japanese with your wife?

[cursore]

Hi Maciamo

I haven’t been in this forum for long but I noticed your acute criticism toward Japan…

I guess it is hard being a foreign in Japan than in any other country.
Here in Europe and USA it is easier to have a mixture of ethnicities and people are not surprised is a Black can speak good Italian in Italy or a Chinese good French in France. May be due our colonialism attitudes in the past centuries? I don’t know

Don’t get yourself down if you could not stand life there there is always the rest of the world… and if you get a ryanair flight to Scotland let me know we go out for a pint!

Ciao

[DoctorP]

so Maciamo...can you eat natto?

[Carlson]

well your were always nice to me. and i hope everything works out.

[Mamoru-kun]

Of course! How could you consider going and live in Japan when you have Belgium near?!

[Duo]

Of course! How could you consider going and live in Japan when you have Belgium near?!

For those non-belgium informed i shall say that belgium is one of the best places to live that I know of... ;)

furthermore i beleive we are in nsync with each other about the culture center mamoru-kun sorry to not have responded before but i have been slacking a bit lately when it comes to forum participation

[GoldCoinLover]

Wow..

Maciamo, I'm curious what you don't like about the language? I'm still learning alot about the sentence structure and different ways to say things.

Did you go 'cold turkey' in japan where you didnt know any japanesE?

Well I've always been interested in the japaense language since i was 7, and learned to count to ten in japanese from my karate class at the same age. I became interested from japanese pokemon cards, and now I no longer feel as hopeless in learning it. I probably know around 100 kanji, and I recognize alot more now. But I'm not gonna give up on it.

I went to frys eletronics the other day, and saw some japanes eimport game. It sparked my interest once again. I love cities, big cities, the more lights the better. Something about it. I don't live in a big city (About 30 minutes away from phoenix) but I love neon lights. Heh. I've read many of your threads, and I feel like it's giving me a good view of japanese culture (albeit, one sided) of the culture.

It is discouraging me though -- alot. It makes me not want to live there (Because I want to live there as a long term resident as well)
Good luck to you.

I'm saddened that you left after all that time. You learned to speak japanese fleuntly, now it's going to go to waste

[Mike Cash]

His biggest problem was, I think, the nature of the people he encountered in his work doing language teaching. The default mode in those settings is for the foreignness of the teacher to be a large part of the focus. A thing which bugged him to no end, and which I can well understand since it bugged me to no end either.

Moving out of that field and into something where his foreignness (appearance, language ability, whatever) played no role at all would have done much to alleviate that particular stress.

You are certainly correct that a good many other foreigners have similar experiences and reactions. Those few of us who make our peace with it stay; the overwhelming majority leave. That Maciamo couldn't tolerate it anymore and left is in no way a negative reflection on him. Nor should it be taken as a damning indictment of Japan.

My personal opinion (and it is only that: opinion) has always been that part of the problem also stems from the tendency for foreigners to take a trip home once or twice a year. It's hard to settle your heart and mind in Japan when you're always busy bouncing your a55 in and out.

Also, there is a very strong tendency for people to spend a lot of time examining their continued stays in Japan around the 3 year mark. Traditionally, that's about the time even the diehards give up and pack their bags. Concerns about family and career start to play very strongly on people's minds. This also seems to happen to guys a lot somewhere around the age of 30, regardless of their age when they showed up in Japan. It also happens when there are children involved who are about to reach school age.

I left once before, but ended up coming back.

[blade_bltz]

Maciamo - just out of curiosity, have you ever lived in the US? If so, could you briefly share some of your opinions/experiences. Sorry if this is common knowledge to the rest of the forum...

[Ma Cherie]

Maciamo - just out of curiosity, have you ever lived in the US? If so, could you briefly share some of your opinions/experiences. Sorry if this is common knowledge to the rest of the forum...

*whispers* Mac has been to the US, but...........I don't think he would want to visit the US again. *whispers*

[Maciamo]

*whispers* Mac has been to the US, but...........I don't think he would want to visit the US again. *whispers*

As a tourist, I wouldn't mind going back to the US. In fact, I really want to visit New York, Boston, Washington and California, and maybe also a few national parks. But I certainly wouldn't like to live in the US for several reasons (if I have too, it would probably be in NY or New England).

[Apollo]

I have just seen this thread....I must be more active in here....
I am surprised, but happy that you are happy with the choice.

Was it very easy going back to Belgium? I mean, finding a house and finding a job for you/and your wife can be quite time-consuming.

[Pachipro]

It is discouraging me though -- alot. It makes me not want to live there (Because I want to live there as a long term resident as well)

And what I'v read in this thread makes me less desire to go go Japan ,I was curious about Japan though.

Do not make one, or a few peoples' experiences, decide for you whether you should go to Japan or not. As I've said in another thread, to deny yourself the experience of visiting Japan, if that is your desire, based on a few "bad experiences" is to deny yourself an education. Unless you've experienced it for yourself how will you ever know? Just because someone else had a bad experience doesn't mean that you will also. You may just find that you like the country.

I have debated with Maciamo numerous times in the past and, if you've read any of my posts, you'll see that I had a completely opposite experience and I lived there many more years than he did.

Originally Posted by Gaijin 06
Don't take what you read in this thread about Japan as a representative sample of most foreigners experiences. Japan can be a hard place to integrate into, but if you make enough effort and are open minded enough then it is possible to live a happy life here.

I have met (and work with) a lot of "foreigners", including Chinese who've been here a long time and they like Japan and Japanese people.

I'm sorry but y not ? Maciamo has surely tried enough to fit in Japan yet to no avail. Also I have read the same reactions that he has had by many other foreigners.... one of them Will Fergusson in the book Hokkaido Highway Blues..

But the question remains, "Did he really try to fit into Japan or did he try and make Japan fit into his view of what Japan should be based on his views and opinions and western thinking?" After a year here on JRef, I believe in the latter as Maciamo's desire seemed to be that Japan should change its entire culture based on what he, and others, think it should be so that they would feel more comfortable living there. Unfortunately, this is an all too common ailment of foreigners living in Japan. They try to change it or lash out against it and, when things don't change, they leave in utter frustration giving others, who have never been to Japan, a false impression of the country and its culture.

Do not misinterpret what I am saying here. Maciamo is not wrong in his assessment of Japan, but it should not be taken as the rule as I, and others, have a completely different assessment and experiences. What bothered him never bothered me as I understood just where the Japanese were coming from. His is just one mans opinion and is shared by many frustrated gaijin.

As I said above, just because he and a couple of others had a bad experience, does not mean everyone will. Gaijin 06 is correct in his assessment.

You are certainly correct that a good many other foreigners have similar experiences and reactions. Those few of us who make our peace with it stay; the overwhelming majority leave. That Maciamo couldn't tolerate it anymore and left is in no way a negative reflection on him. Nor should it be taken as a damning indictment of Japan.

Like you Mike I left once only to return less than a year later. Foreigners who stay have made their peace with the differences in the culture and I do not forsee it changing anytime in the near, or distant, future.

I find this interesting (and unfortunate), because in my case, the balance has shifted more in favor of good experiences the longer I've been involved with Japan, and as my understanding of the culture and command of the language have improved. This is why I'm surprised that your good experiences have been so few (and actually decreased with time), as I know that you have a fairly good command of the language, and I would think that would have allowed you to make more positive relationships, i.e. people who you can have meaningful conversations with, as opposed to "Wow, you can use chopsticks!" etc.

You explained it so well and said much of what I wanted to say and feel that there is not much I can add to your fine assessment and analysis of the situation of living there as I feel pretty much the same way.

As a famous author once said, "East is East and West is West, and never the Twain shall meet."

Perhaps this story, "East is East - Get Used To It", in the British newspaper, The Guardian, explains a little better what I and others are trying to say here. Japan will never change, nor should she and bow to foreign pressure or by foreigners living there. If we (gaijin, foreigners) want to live there, we either accept the country and its customs and culture for what it is or, like Maciamo and many other foreigners, they let it get the best of them and high tail it out of there to live in a place they are more comfortable with. "Can you use chopsticks? Do you have fireworks in your country? Can you eat sushi? Do you sleep on a futon?"

"Yes I can and yes we do", I answer for the umpteenth time. But it doesn't bother me and is a way to make new friends, maintain old ones, and keep a conversation going while learning the little intricacies of a foreign culture as, no matter how long I may be living there, there is always something new to learn. And, even if the same person asks me the same question for the fifth time, I'll politely answer and maybe, with a little frustration, think to myself how ignorant he might really be. But he really is a nice person and has made a sincere effort to be my friend.

There were, and are, many things I do not agree with in Japan and living there. But I, like Mike Cash and jt and Gaijin 06, among others, have "made our peace with it." We understand the cultural differences and accept them and learn to live with them for, if we do not like it, we can always leave.

"But Pachipro, you are not living there! How can you make such statements?", some might ask. Well, for those of you who are new and who may not have read my other posts on this subject, I have lived there for many years, visit once or twice a year and, in a few years, plan to retire there permanently. (Yes I know I have said this more than a few times in past posts.)

As with all countries and cities around the world, Japan has it's good points and its bad points. To me, the good far outweighs the bad and it is a wonderful place to live, in my opinion, and experience. In fact I enjoy living there more than I do here in the US. And it is cheaper here, the roads are less crowded, and no one asks me silly questions unless it is something like, "Is it hot all year in Japan?" or "Do Japanese wear kimono everyday in Japan?" or something silly like that. Try it. You may just like it and discover something new.

[blade_bltz]

Well I asked about America because I've lived in Boston for my entire life (yes, all 18 years), and I think its an exceptional place to live. Right now, I'm at school in the Bay Area of California, and that is another phenomenal place to be. I'm not exactly a hardcore patriot...what with my Massachusetts liberal upbringing...but I see a lot of America bashing on this board. Despite the state of the country under the current administration, I will still attest to the fact that New England is a wonderful place to live. Maciamo, who knows, you might end up there one day.

[Maciamo]

Well I asked about America because I've lived in Boston for my entire life (yes, all 18 years), and I think its an exceptional place to live. Right now, I'm at school in the Bay Area of California, and that is another phenomenal place to be. I'm not exactly a hardcore patriot...what with my Massachusetts liberal upbringing...but I see a lot of America bashing on this board. Despite the state of the country under the current administration, I will still attest to the fact that New England is a wonderful place to live. Maciamo, who knows, you might end up there one day.

The major issues with the States are :

- the food (maybe a bit better in NYC ?)
- the laws (much too conservative, even in "liberal" states)
- the government (esp. since the Bush administration, but I also dislike paranoiac secret services like the CIA, or the "cow-boy" FBI who think they can do whatever they want since the Patriot Act)
- the insecurity (mostly linked to the lack of social security and big gaps between the rich and the poor)
- fanatic Christians (born-again, KKK, etc.)
- rednecks (well, less on the coasts maybe ?)
- everybody is allowed to have a gun (that wouldn't make me feel secure at all - too many lunatics in the world)
- low level of culture and knowledge of too mant people, and ignorance about the rest of the world and even about the USA (similar problem to Japan).
- fanatic Christians (did I mention that ?)
- too materialistic society ("sex & money = life")


I am aware that many people do not fit these generalities, but that's how American society appears to most Europeans who have been there (and didn't stay there ). I suppose that people tend to be more open-minded, better educated and less religious in the North-East and West coasts. I can only judge from the people I met or what I see on TV, as I haven't lived there. I'll tell you after I've stayed there for a while.