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View Poll Results: How do you feel when a Japanese calls you "gaijin" ?

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  • "You are an outsider and will never belong to Japanese society" (exclusion)

    17 29.31%
  • "You are an outsider, ignorant of Japanese ways" (cultural ignorance)

    17 29.31%
  • "You are different from us ! Hahaha !" (childish differentiation)

    12 20.69%
  • "You are not Japanese, but I am" (opposition)

    13 22.41%
  • "You are not a Japanese national" (on the passport)

    11 18.97%
  • "You are not an ethnic Japanese" (different looks)

    13 22.41%
  • "Wow ! You are better than me !" (awe)

    8 13.79%
  • Don't know

    10 17.24%
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Thread: What connotation does the term "gaijin" have for you ?

  1. #126
    Banned Mike Cash's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gaijinalways
    So, please tell me, what was your point, beyond being misleading or overly sarcastic (not sure, yours or mine)?
    My point was that in and of itself, a "permanent" resident visa means nothing as regards the permanency of one's residence. Maciamo loves to point out that he has (had?) permanent residence status....yet he bailed out after just a very brief stay. You yourself indicated that despite currently having PR status, residing here is only what you are doing at the moment, leaving one to surmise that your permanent residency is also of questionable permanence.

    I've stayed here considerably longer than the both of you combined, have no intention of leaving, yet do not yet have a permanent resident visa. By the way, I also am employed, pay taxes, and all the other blah-blah you mentioned that holders of PR visas have or do.

    Maciamo gives the impression that he feels the mere holding of PR status should cause Japanese to consider him as some sort of semi-Japanese and that they should neither notice his foreign origins nor make any comment on it. I always find it funny when people who go on and on about their "permanent" resident status either don't reside in Japan or have expressed their intention to not actually reside here permanently.

  2. #127
    Banned Mike Cash's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ex-gaijin
    Mike-cash - I don't know what sort of company you work for but I'm sure it's not the norm. I could never work 50 hours a week maybe more, no sick-leave, no holidays, no time-off...etc. etc.
    I call working 50 hours "Monday through Thursday". You're right; what I do is not the norm. But a single exception is sufficient to disprove the rule.

    I appreciate your candor in admitting you would not tolerate the same working conditions as your Japanese coworkers. I'm sure you also see how the special (read: "privileged") working conditions typically afforded expat staff, combined with the presumed temporary nature of their presence, conspire to cause Japanese employees to never quite allow for the expat staff to be considered entirely "inside" the circle at work. Those factors alone account for the bulk of the cause, without even needing to give consideration to xenophobia or racism.

    Hachiro - I don't like the attention on me. I don't like being stared all the time. I don't like the feeling of being "unique"...just because I'm tall and hairy. Most people love that probably, I don't!
    I don't suppose you'd find it any consolation to be told that the being stared at problem is only a sickly shadow of its former self. Compared to what it was even only a decade ago, it is practically nonexistant these days.
    Last edited by Mike Cash; Jul 4, 2006 at 18:58. Reason: this is my day for tag errors

  3. #128
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    Quote Originally Posted by ex-gaijin
    Mike-cash - I don't know what sort of company you work for but I'm sure it's not the norm. I could never work 50 hours a week maybe more, no sick-leave, no holidays, no time-off...etc. etc.
    I am not Mike Cash, but a 50 hour work week in a Japanese company is indeed the norm. Well, 50 or more. That's about what I work. I have worked at at least one job where 50 hours a week would have sounded like a vacation!

    But Japanese have a different mentality towards overtime than perhaps many people in the West do. Overtime is just part of the deal. I go to work 30 minutes early, and I usually stay a good 2 hours past my official ending time. Or longer. Oh, and the nature of my contract is such that I do not get paid for overtime. Not a single yen.

    Why do I do it? It's just what you do. Being the first person to go home is almost embarrassing. Being late is inexcusable barring some natural disaster! Taking a week off for personal vacation seems so selfish, even if I am entitled to the days of vacation by my contract.

    I guess one way to put it is to say that in Japan the contract is the minimum amount of effort required in your job. If you care about your job, you are expected and expect yourself to go the extra mile.

    This is how I feel, anyway.

  4. #129
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    Quote Originally Posted by ex-gaijin
    It`s all part of the process, the language, the aizuchi. the gitaigo...that all helps to make you clearer and to undestand the locals, I think! Obvioulsy when I speak English, I don`t really say ehhh tooo, sokka....ahaha ehhh nani?
    Thanks for your response! (I included the quote just to make it clear that this post is in response to yours. I like your example!)

    I thought of another question. Would you say that you noticed the rude behavior directed at you more at any one time than another, or moreso under certain conditions, or after a certain point in time?

    Quote Originally Posted by gaijinalways
    Sorry Mikawa, didn't realize it's 'old' water under the bridge, so to speak, I haven't posted here that long in this forum.
    No problem! If my memory serves me correctly, this is one of several topics that Maciamo and I have mutually agreed to disagree and leave it at that.

    For that reason I do not get remotely upset by his posts on this topic. I think I know what post of mine you were referring to when you included me in your comment on "the tiff". If I'm correct, my actual point in that post was that getting too emotional over something, especially when an admin comes in, will only lead to trouble. I phrased it to be a little flavorful, so I can understand how it was less than crystal clear. But seriously, if one ONLY posted posts as dry as this, it wouldn't be very interesting, would it?

  5. #130
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    Hachiro - I don't like the attention on me. I don't like being stared all the time. I don't like the feeling of being "unique"...just because I'm tall and hairy. Most people love that probably, I don't!
    Well I stand 193CM so I stick out quite a bit. I have gotten used to people staring. I never said I liked it, yet I have gotten accustomed to people "looking". If people want to stare that's fine by me, it's their problem not mine.

    Hell I remember when I was a kid and seeing NBA players that literally dwarfed me, standing 7ft tall or more, I STARED at them too.

    The attention is fleeting at best, annoying at worst. BUT it is one of the things that us "giant" gaijin have to live with here in Japan.

    Oh and btw the Japanese sumo wrestlers and team Japan volleyball players get stared at just as much as we henna gaijin do.


    I wont lie and say that it doesnt bother me at times, particularly when everyone around you only stands about 170 to 175cm at best, like lined up at a funeral, paying respects to the dead. People NOTICE, but then again people would notice ANYTHING out of the expected "ordinary" too.

    I don't suppose you'd find it any consolation to be told that the being stared at problem is only a sickly shadow of its former self. Compared to what it was even only a decade ago, it is practically nonexistant these days.
    Yes sir you are quite right, it HAS gotten better than before, and with time things will improve more still.

    I was raised in an area that one HAD to have a 6th sense to survive, so I can feel the hairs raising on the back of my neck when someone stares at me....do you know the feeling I am talking about....you can just sense it. Over here THAT sense has gone haywire because it happens so often. Once you can learn to shut it off it gets easier, at least it did to me.

    Oh an to being unique, whether you like it or not YOU are unique. The sooner you get accustomed to it the easier it is to accept life living here in Japan. Cheers!

  6. #131
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    Quote Originally Posted by ex-gaijin
    you guys know that when it come to work conditions foreigners are treated differently!
    I too have an identical contract to my co-workers. I get the same benefits, bonuses and salary scale that they do. I also regularly work longer hours than just about any foreigner I know (I've never met Mike Cash!), but I enjoy my job so it's not really an issue.

    This week and next are particularly busy. I will probably leave my house at 6am each day and get home at about 10pm (Monday-Friday, plus Saturdays when I'll work a half day). It's not always like this, but when things need doing, everyone mucks in. I wouldn't dream of skulking off home when the rest of my department are sat at their desks finishing stuff off.

    I haven't done anything different to anyone else in this company. I just follow the rules, stick to my job, try to give a little more than I'm paid for, and my company has been incredibly good to me as a result.

  7. #132
    puzzled gaijin
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    Mike Cash posted
    My point was that in and of itself, a "permanent" resident visa means nothing as regards the permanency of one's residence. Maciamo loves to point out that he has (had?) permanent residence status....yet he bailed out after just a very brief stay. You yourself indicated that despite currently having PR status, residing here is only what you are doing at the moment, leaving one to surmise that your permanent residency is also of questionable permanence.
    Thanks Mike, that was much clearer. would like to add though that I said my wife also, who is Japanese, wants to leave as well.
    I think you are misreading the meaning of 'permanent residence'. It implies that we often have a slightly more invested interest in what goes on in the country, because of family, length of stay,etc. No place that I have lived would I look at as a real permanent residence, in other words, have passport, love to live around, i.e. I am not tied to any one place.

    As to paying taxes etc, it was obvious that Maciamo and I brought this up in response to your tourist comment, remember?

    As to how long you've been here, are you looking for some recognition or have you just forgotten what life is like anywhere else ?

    Mikawa,

    No problem, just seems that things get heated on occasion, perhaps more than necessary. I have seen a lot on another forum that I have accused of being a forum version of Japan-Lite as the members can't bear to have somebody seriously criticize Japanese society. One of the members, perhaps half-Japanese (Japanese American), doesn't even live here yet thinks he knows what I think and how society runs here. I'm still waiting for him to show up again (he was a real tourist with an extended 6 week tour) and get his illusions shattered by living here.

    Hachiro,

    I'm 198.3, know the feeling, but I would suggest some of the staring is not related to above average height. I have seen people stare at average height foreigners too, both men and women. In countries where people never have left the country and they get few tourists, you might expect it, but here? Technology just doesn't prepare you for reality, does it?

  8. #133
    JREF Resident Alien Pachipro's Avatar
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    Great replies and an interesting, amicable debate. I have a few questions myself for Mike Cash, Stinger, Mikawa Ossan and others who work for Japanese companies and follow the same rules and working hours of the Japanese.

    Do you find yourself or feel "discriminated" against in the same vein as ex-gaijin?

    Are you accepted by your colleagues as any Japanese would be?

    Do you participate in outside activities with your co-workers and bosses like drinking after work, or golf on weekends or company outings and such?

    I ask this because I also followed the "unwritten rules" when I worked for a Japanese trading company in Japan and the Japanese company I worked for here in the US for 9 years.

    I stayed the extra hours in Japan and when all other Americans here in the US company went home at exactly 4:30. I played golf on the weekends here in the US even when I really didn't want to, participated in company outings. Had colleagues over for dinner and vice-versa, went out with colleagues after work in Japan, etc. Why? because I knew it was expected of any Japanese worker. Something my American colleagues could not, and would not, do.

    Maybe, psychologically, I "thought" I was no different from them as I spoke their language, lived, ate, and commuted like they do and therefore, acted like I was one of them. I never even thought about discrimination in the work place and was quite comfortable. I don't know what the answer is.

    And you know what? I hardly ever felt discriminated against or put off by the rest of the staff. Well, to be honest, I really did feel that way by some of the aloofness I felt by one or two colleagues at times but I surmised that it was more out of jealousy or a dislike for foreigners in general. For the most part, I was treated as an equal and felt as such. I received no special treatment, was scolded a few times and praised on other times for my work. Much as my Japanese colleagues. No better, no worse. And my promotions in the US company matched the effort I put into the job. The bad part was that I was looked at like a kind of "Uncle Tom" by my American colleagues of which I will not go into here.

    Would I do it today? Now? Again? Probably not as I've been too spoiled these past 8 years driving a truck and away from the corporate rat race, but I did enjoy it for the most part and, in a weird way, it gave me a sense of "belonging" if that is the right word. Not that I NEEDED to belong to anything. Maybe it's something I cannot put into words. My thoughts on it were, "Hey, this is how it's done in a Japanese company. If you don't like it leave." I liked it.

    I may have been a gaijin, but I sure didn't feel it or was made to feel like one.
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  9. #134
    Banned Mike Cash's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pachipro
    Great replies and an interesting, amicable debate. I have a few questions myself for Mike Cash, Stinger, Mikawa Ossan and others who work for Japanese companies and follow the same rules and working hours of the Japanese.

    Do you find yourself or feel "discriminated" against in the same vein as ex-gaijin?
    Not at all. I attribute in in part to my being employed even though I am a foreigner instead of being employed just because I am a foreigner. If anything, being a foreigner is a distinct handicap to obtaining employment in my field. Certainly no aspect of my foreignness plays any role in my work.

    Are you accepted by your colleagues as any Japanese would be?
    Yes.

    Do you participate in outside activities with your co-workers and bosses like drinking after work, or golf on weekends or company outings and such?
    Yes.

  10. #135
    Banned Mike Cash's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gaijinalways
    Mike Cash posted
    Thanks Mike, that was much clearer. would like to add though that I said my wife also, who is Japanese, wants to leave as well.
    I noticed that. It is irrelevant to my point, though. That you want to leave is not.

    I think you are misreading the meaning of 'permanent residence'.
    I am not misreading it in the slightest. I am a permanent resident. I reside here permanently. You and Maciamo are/were "permanent" residents. One of you has left and the other wishes to leave. The both of you have permanent resident visas, but you are not permanent residents. Perhaps in the sense that a permanent wave is "permanent", but that's about it.

    It implies that we often have a slightly more invested interest in what goes on in the country, because of family, length of stay,etc.
    While either not actually residing in Japan, or planning to not reside here permanently.....


    As to paying taxes etc, it was obvious that Maciamo and I brought this up in response to your tourist comment, remember?
    I recall you bringing it up. Did Maciamo mention it as well? The fact that he basically let some little kids saying "gaijin da!" run him out of the country after a very brief stay sort of takes the wind out of the sails of anything he may have to say regarding permanent residency and one has to wonder why he still wears (or ever wore) that visa as some sort of badge of honor.

    As to how long you've been here, are you looking for some recognition
    Not at all. I only mention it to point out that a permanent resident visa does not a permanent resident make.

    or have you just forgotten what life is like anywhere else ?
    I've spent almost my entire adult life here, and the America of my childhood is gone forever, so one could perhaps make a strong case that I have forgotten what life is like anywhere else.

  11. #136
    Twirling dragon Maciamo's Avatar
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    Do you participate in outside activities with your co-workers and bosses like drinking after work, or golf on weekends or company outings and such?
    I wonder if Japan also copied the US after WWII for this. In Belgium (and many European countries) people just don't go out with their coworkers or boss after work. We also don't play golf or go to see baseball, football or whatever other sport with clients or coworkers. I know that Japan already copied the US for having sports clubs in schools, and school vs school tournaments (e.g. baseball, American football, boxing...). We also don't do that here. Work is work. School is school. Sport clubs and competition are separate things done in private. Same for going out; people go out with their friends (and especially girl/boyfriend) not with coworkers. I personally dislike both watching sports and drink in bars or other loud places. I imagine how hard it must be when the so-called social customs force you to do so even if you dislike it.

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  12. #137
    Twirling dragon Maciamo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MikeCash
    Did Maciamo mention it as well? The fact that he basically let some little kids saying "gaijin da!" run him out of the country after a very brief stay sort of takes the wind out of the sails of anything he may have to say regarding permanent residency and one has to wonder why he still wears (or ever wore) that visa as some sort of badge of honor.
    You never miss an opportunity to badmouth me, do you ?

  13. #138
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pachipro
    Great replies and an interesting, amicable debate.
    I don't see it so much a debate as an exchange of ideas at this point. I think it's a great conversation thus far, and I am glad that everyone seems to be maintaining level heads about everything!
    I have a few questions myself for Mike Cash, Stinger, Mikawa Ossan and others who work for Japanese companies and follow the same rules and working hours of the Japanese.
    Do you find yourself or feel "discriminated" against in the same vein as ex-gaijin?
    By my coworkers? Never. Not once. I had a job where a girl didn't like me (probably because I am not a native speaker and therefore have certain "holes" in my Japanese), but I didn't care for her, either.

    Actually, I take that back now that I think of it. She decided she didn't like me after I told one of her ex-clients that she was busy with another client,
    but I could call her if they liked. They decided against bothering her, as they had only come to say hi anyway, which I relayed to her soon. But, you can't please all people.
    Are you accepted by your colleagues as any Japanese would be?
    To the best of my knowledge, yes.
    Do you participate in outside activities with your co-workers and bosses like drinking after work, or golf on weekends or company outings and such?
    Yes.

  14. #139
    Banned Mike Cash's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maciamo
    You never miss an opportunity to badmouth me, do you ?
    You consider a statement of fact badmouthing?

  15. #140
    puzzled gaijin
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    Maciamo posted
    Same for going out; people go out with their friends (and especially girl/boyfriend) not with coworkers.
    Possibly, though it is much more flexible in America, the going out with coworkers; if you want to do it, you might, but if you just feel like leaving work to do your own thing, it's cool. An Englishman mentioned the same thing to me, that in English people didn't generally go out with coworkers.

    Mike Cash posted
    The fact that he basically let some little kids saying "gaijin da!" run him out of the country after a very brief stay sort of takes the wind out of the sails of anything he may have to say regarding permanent residency and one has to wonder why he still wears (or ever wore) that visa as some sort of badge of honor.
    Maciamo posted
    You never miss an opportunity to badmouth me, do you ?
    Mike Cash posted
    You consider a statement of fact badmouthing?
    Hmm, the impression I get here is that you are glossing over a lot of Maciamo's other experiences in Japan as the 'dame' kids were a small part of what he related. As to it being a badge of honor, yours is a matter of opinion, hardly a statement of fact.

    Gaijinalways posted
    Thanks Mike, that was much clearer. would like to add though that I said my wife also, who is Japanese, wants to leave as well.
    Mike Cash posted
    I noticed that. It is irrelevant to my point, though. That you want to leave is not.
    I think it's very relevant as people carry different travel docuements, but can choose to live where they wish, my wife and I included. The permanent resident status is similar to being a resident alien in the US.

    Gaijinalways posted
    I think you are misreading the meaning of 'permanent residence'.
    Mike Cash posted
    I am not misreading it in the slightest. I am a permanent resident. I reside here permanently. You and Maciamo are/were "permanent" residents. One of you has left and the other wishes to leave. The both of you have permanent resident visas, but you are not permanent residents. Perhaps in the sense that a permanent wave is "permanent", but that's about it.
    Gaijinalways posted
    It implies that we often have a slightly more invested interest in what goes on in the country, because of family, length of stay,etc.
    Mike Cash posted
    While either not actually residing in Japan, or planning to not reside here permanently.....
    I am still residing here at the moment. Just to add to that, what's permanent is very much a matter of perception.

    Actually, it is indeed more than that as I am planning to adopt my wife's family name (forget the exact term in Japanese). In other words, I would be eligible to inherit property from them directly, which at the moment I can't. That seems to be a pretty permanent link to me. In addition, my in-laws plan to retire in Hawaii near us, so I expect my link to that part of Japan will remain for some time to come .

  16. #141
    Banned Mike Cash's Avatar
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    You do realize you just made yourself sound like a gold digger, don't you?

  17. #142
    Regular Member ex-gaijin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mikawa Ossan
    I thought of another question. Would you say that you noticed the rude behavior directed at you more at any one time than another, or moreso under certain conditions, or after a certain point in time?
    I started noticing the "attitude" towards me after a certain time, probably only when I started picking up the language and understanding what was going on around me. As I have an MA in Japanese Studies, it didn`t take too long to get to the point to have a conversation with a native. Say, 4-5 months probably! At that point I started having the feeling that there was something weird about the way they related to me. It just didn`t sound right.

  18. #143
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    Sorry for the late reply. Rather ironically, I didn't have time to get online because work was so busy

    Quote Originally Posted by Pachipro
    Do you find yourself or feel "discriminated" against in the same vein as ex-gaijin?
    I have to admit, I don't entirely understand the question. I'm not sure what you mean by ex-gaijin. But on the subject of discrimination, I don't really feel any different from my co-workers. I think Mike and subsequent poster's comments about special treatment for expat workers echoes my feeling. If I went home on the dot of 5pm every day and didn't do anything outside my working hours, sure I'd probably get treated differently, but I try to tow the line.

    Sometimes the fact that I am from a different country is difficult to avoid, or it has an influence on things. But this is rarely a negative thing; for example if we go to karaoke, I get bombarded with requests to sing The Beatles or other English bands. But I see that much more as celebrating my culture rather than being treated differently. Or since it's my native language I might get asked to do something involving use of English, such as when we had some Australians visit our office a few weeks ago, and I was asked to show them around. But if you have a group of visitors in the building who don't speak a lot of Japanese, assigning the English guy to look after them is just plain common sense.

    Are you accepted by your colleagues as any Japanese would be?
    Well put it this way. In April@of this year I got promotion. This was based on my manager, my manager's manager and several co-workers recommending this course of action to the president. I don't think they would have done that if they had a grudge against me.

    Do you participate in outside activities with your co-workers and bosses like drinking after work, or golf on weekends or company outings and such?
    I actually quite enjoy our company dinners (in fact probably more so than some of my colleagues) . I don't play golf, mainly because I can't, but I'm thinking about taking it up. Every once in a while we have a company weekend away usually to an onsen/resort. 18 of my co-workers came to my wedding. 2 of them gave speeches.

  19. #144
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    Quote Originally Posted by gaijinalways
    Just to add to that, what's permanent is very much a matter of perception.
    Eh? No it's not. Something is either permanent or it's not. Perception doesn't come into it. The distinction is as clear as black and white. I don't disagree with some of the stuff you said, but I have to take issue with this particular comment.

    Quote Originally Posted by Maciamo
    You never miss an opportunity to badmouth me, do you ?
    Mr. Pot meet Mr. Kettle.

  20. #145
    puzzled gaijin
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    Mike Cash posted
    You do realize you just made yourself sound
    like a gold digger, don't you?
    So I guess my wife, who wants me to do it, is one too?

    No, I think the bigger problem is, you don't know my situation. My wife is concerned about her parents's future, but also changing my name would bring some additional duties.

    In addition, obviously Maciamo still has duties as well as he is still married so he still has some link to his wife's family here in Japan. Whether we wish to reside here or not doesn't lessen the familial ties that we have here.


    Posted by gaijinalways
    Just to add to that, what's permanent is very much a matter of perception.
    Stinger posted
    Eh? No it's not. Something is either permanent or it's not. Perception doesn't come into it. The distinction is as clear as black and white. I don't disagree with some of the stuff you said, but I have to take issue with this particular comment.
    Well, we might have to disagree then. For me the distinction is not that clear, I didn't create the name that the Japanese Government uses for the visa or residency permit, I just use it. I may continue to use it if I 'share' my residency between here and the US (or Europe if we can manage jobs there). So as I said earlier, permanance is in your perception. recently the only things that seem really permanent to me are life and death, but then I could put taxes in the same category for most people (and paying those government health insurance premiums here, ouch).

  21. #146
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    Re: Gold digging

    Quote Originally Posted by gaijinalways
    So I guess my wife, who wants me to do it, is one too?
    No, I think the bigger problem is, you don't know my situation. My wife is concerned about her parents's future, but also changing my name would bring some additional duties.
    To be fair to Mike, he was pointing out that your comments made you sound like a gold digger. Not that you are one. Which was indeed true - you did give the impression that you were changing your name for material gain.

    So as I said earlier, permanance is in your perception. recently the only things that seem really permanent to me are life and death, but then I could put taxes in the same category for most people (and paying those government health insurance premiums here, ouch).
    Again, a slightly academic point, but what I was meaning was that the concept of 'permanence' is non-negotiable. It has a fixed and intransient meaning in the English language. 'Permanent residence' on the other hand is a different issue. Actually from your follow up comments, I'm not sure you fully understand the definition of the word, given that you classify life and tax as permanent entities when neither is so.

  22. #147
    Junior Member DoctorP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gaijinalways
    Actually, it is indeed more than that as I am planning to adopt my wife's family name (forget the exact term in Japanese). In other words, I would be eligible to inherit property from them directly, which at the moment I can't. That seems to be a pretty permanent link to me.
    I said I wouldn't be back, but I hate ignorance. Therefore I find it necessary for me to hang around and keep people in check.


    I'm not sure if it is necessary to change your name or not...I just purchased land in my name though and I'm not even a "permanent resident!"

  23. #148
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    Quote Originally Posted by CC1
    I said I wouldn't be back, but I hate ignorance. Therefore I find it necessary for me to hang around and keep people in check.


    I'm not sure if it is necessary to change your name or not...I just purchased land in my name though and I'm not even a "permanent resident!"
    CC1 You are not the only one either, a buddy of mine has land and built a house and all the property is in his name, not his wifes.

  24. #149
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    Quote Originally Posted by gaijinalways
    Mike Cash posted
    So I guess my wife, who wants me to do it, is one too?

    No, I think the bigger problem is, you don't know my situation. My wife is concerned about her parents's future, but also changing my name would bring some additional duties.
    The bigger problem is that you didn't read what I said. You read what you thought I said.

    I didn't say you are a gold digger. Nor did I say your wife is a gold digger.

    In addition, obviously Maciamo still has duties as well as he is still married so he still has some link to his wife's family here in Japan. Whether we wish to reside here or not doesn't lessen the familial ties that we have here.
    Has someone stated or suggested otherwise? I must have missed it.

  25. #150
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    The bigger problem is that you didn't read what I said. You read what you thought I said.

    I didn't say you are a gold digger. Nor did I say your wife is a gold digger.
    Hey Mike as you probably already know people here only read what they want to hear and not what is written.

    Mike is right you know, he hasnt accused anyone of anything!

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