I think many Japanese are tough to accept marriage as a rite of passage in the course of the life. Social pressure to get married is very strong in Japan (or some other countries as well). I've been away from Japan more than 10 years since I turned 20; so, I don't subscribe to the cultural norm without any hesitation.
I am single and I just do not feel like getting married. Even though it would be nice to have a close significant other, I feel I would be shackled to the institution called marriage if I got married. My married male colleagues have to hand over their pay checks to their wives every month. I know I cannot do it as I am so used to spending what I have earned on whatever I feel like spending. Some estimates put a price tag of JPY 50 million for raising a kid for 22 years in Japan. I would rather keep that money in the mutual funds or stocks and use it for my early retirement. Some people want to get married and have children so that they don't feel lonely when they get old. By the time I would need to get in the home, my mental ability would be bad enough to recognize who is caring me.
love the old style wedding!
love the dress (not the guys' though)
In India too the concapt of marriage has been traditionally the same, where the men were exceedingly dominating and women mere cooks and nannys. Like in Japan, marriage was arranged and children-centric. Women are expected by many even now to stop work after marriage. Also sex was non-existent many a times within the marriage.
But things are changing for good. Things are going liberal while keeping in touch with the traditions. Love has won over the race for children in many cases. Also the society is becoming acceptable to married women working.
It's so strange this subject ... I rarely think about marriage and even more rarely hear it mentioned. It seems like marriage is sort of an afterthought in western culture and comes secondary to pretty much everything else in a realtionship.
I know I certainly think about my relationship and the future of it and possibly children (one day) ... but almost never about marriage. It just seems like such an overdone thing, so many people always want to have the biggest and best wedding ever and show off in style, they spend ridiculous amounts of money, some even driving themselves to debt just to pay for a good show.
People (and I think Japan is probably as guilty of this as the west, maybe even more so) have turned marriage into a spectacle. It doesn't feel 'special' or like the 'sacred union' that it once was. I'm honestly not sure which is worse, really, getting married and then divorced a year later or having a mock white, chapel wedding that you borrowed from another culture.![]()
All Hail to the HYPNOTOAD *clap* *clap* *clap*
MadamePapillion postedThis thread was forgotten for 2 years! As to marriage itself, it's more than an afterthought for some in Western countries (such a general concept). Many people, at least in the backs of their minds, are thinking of getting married, hence a reason that they date.this subject ... I rarely think about marriage and even more rarely hear it mentioned. It seems like marriage is sort of an afterthought in western culture and comes secondary to pretty much everything else in a realtionship
Some girls just love to get married as soon as possible and some don't. It really depends in each person. So just get married whenever you're ready and whenever you find the right person.![]()
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